❤ I promise ; Forever.

❤ Monday, February 16, 2009

everytime i tell myself to blog i always find myself too lazy, thinking "i'll do it tomorrow"

then when tomorrow comes the cycles goes.

(-_-")

maintaining a blog is not easy lor.

at least i'm trying!

so this is gonna be a LONG POST.

as i'm gonna write in every single detail of how my baby came into this world.

baby girl has also been keeping me very busy as well..

so sleep deprived!!

i hope when i start work in april she sleeps more at night so i will be able too.

she's my

MILK SUCKING - POOPING MACHINE!!

well, today mil, hubby & i brought baby out to the pediatrician at gleneagles for her first week checkup.

doc says she is doing very well.

she is also getting prettier day by day.

NO MORE CONE HEAD!!

well, you'll know what i mean later as i write on.

today is also exactly a week from the day that

i got admitted to the hospital which was 09/02/09

(nice number right?? it was also the last 15th day of CNY.)

so it started off with my regular checkup at the gynae's.

i knew it was going to be my last as well,

as the last appointment he already said i would need to be admitted if baby still doesn't want to come out.

my mom & mil was there to keep me company.

and he did the usual scanning & stuffs.

(the last time i'll ever get to see my baby in my belly!!)

& I ALREADY MISS BEING PREGGY!!!

has the many months i have been pregnant passed so fast already?

=(

i also miss the feeling of my baby girl kicking & having the hiccups in my tummy & laughing with hubby whenever she does it.

now hubby only gan chiong for baby, no more abt me le.

so anyway i got a shock when my gynae said i had to be admitted on that very night cos i was expecting it to be the next day.

after that my mil brought me & my mom out to BOON TONG KEE to eat their famous chicken rice for a good feast!

(i'm so deprived now lor, everyday only can eat fish & pork. aiyo..)

then went home to re-pack hospital stuff & have dinner.

and had SEASEME TANG YUAN to celebrate the last day of CNY.

i love!!!

at 10PM or so, my in-laws & hubby went down to the hospital with me.

& left after i settled down.

my first night alone in the hospital was a lonely one,

as no one was allowed to stay with me as i was in an A2 ward.

(which is a 2 bedder)

at 12AM the nurse inserted a pill into my cervix to soften & dilate it.

so i sat in bed munching biscuits & drinking milo at odd hours as i couldnt sleep.

1) fearful & worried of what was going to happen when i go into labour.

2) my neighbour just gave birth & she had problems feeding her baby.

ZZZ..

at 5AM i was given a light breakfast.

and yeah, sat in bed for about and hour & half,

waiting for the nurses to bring me into the delivery suite.

at about 630AM i was brought to the suite.

hubby came early morning & kept me company.

waited for the my gynae to come & he inserted a fat cannula down my hand & connected it to a drip to induce me.

then he broke my waterbag.

SILENT TEARS LITERALLY RAN DOWN MY FACE!

cos it hurt.

but it was only the BEGINNING.

i started contractions & i held on strong for about 6 hours or so.

refusing epidural despite continous encouragement from my gynae & nurses to do so.

surviving only on gas mask to help reduce the pain.

initially it did help, but gradually the pain got too much to bear.

i inhaled too much gas until my head felt high & my body felt numb until i felt like it was flaoting away.

hubby had 2 tests on that day.

SO SUAY CAN??

so he, my mom & mil took turns to come into the delivery suite to keep me company as only one person is allowed in at a time and hubby rushed up & down from school.

so after crawling though another 2 hours or so,

the nurses came to check how much i was dilating.

only freaking 2CM!!!

and i was already in so much pain!

another 8CM to go.

BUEY TAHAN.

finally took epidural as each dilation was estimated to be an hour.

meaning 8 hours to go.

anyway,

NOBODY TOLD ME THE PROCESS OF TAKING EPIDURAL HURT SO DAMN MUCH!!

the doctor inserted 3 or 4 needles into my spinal cord,

i cant remember as i was already in so much pain.

each needle he inserted felt like hell,

crying out loud each time he inserted it.

lucky i had hubby beside me at that time to hold my hand..

the numbing feeling, the electricuted feeling, my ears were ringing & sometimes the voices i heard sounded as if the person was repeating their words twice.

then i felt my body numbing to the pain again until i felt my body literally burning as if the pain was already to the maximum.

my head was floating due to the excessive use of the gas mask,

but was conscious to what people were saying after awhile.

only that my body was not listening to me.

after awhile the effect wore off,

my gynae was saying it was because i was enduring so much pain before finally taking the epidural that was why i was likedat after it was given to me..

and i no long felt pain as my contractions intensified & gradually the stone-ness wore off.

5CM dilated!

i was so happy.

then my gynae told me that baby was still quite high up despite 5CM dilation.

he told me i needed to do an

IMMEDIATE EMERGENCY C-SECTION.

and i was so frighten & unprepared.

worst of all nobody could come in with me, even hubby.

i was so scared that i was in tears,

as they were preparing me for the operation & getting my mom to sign the form.

my body was shaking very badly due to being cold & the side effect of the epidural.

at the operation theatre my gynae comforted me & slowly i started drifting in and out of sleep.

i was still shaking vigorously and i feeling so cold i just wanted to pull out the epidural connected to my spinal cord.

however i didnt feel a thing as i was cut open becos of the epidural.

but i felt my gynae stretching and pulling my belly.

(sounds gross hor?)

then he told me the reason why baby isnt able to come out was becos my pelvic bone was so small,

that she tried coming out but cannot,

therefore my baby came out with a CONE HEAD,

my little cone head! =)

(-_-")

but it would reduce in size in a few days.

my pelvic bone was literally so small that my gynae even had problems taking her out when performing the c-section.

suddenly i felt like A WEIGHT HAS BEEN LIFTED OFF ME.

and i heard the crying sounds of my baby girl.

i smiled to myself.

after drifting in & out of sleep again.

the nurses asked me if i wanted to see her.

i simply nodded my head, too weak & cold & still shaking to do anything else.

and they placed my girl on my chest as my gynae stitched me up.

the first thoughts that ran through my mind was,

SHE WAS SO BEAUTIFUL!!

(despite her cone head, but it didnt bother me one bit)

she didnt cry, AT ALL & her big shiny eyes kept staring at me as if saying,

"mummy, im finally here"

=)

and i smiled at her for the first time.

when the nurses took her away she den started crying.

i was so happy because i knew she recognised mummy therefore she didnt cry when she was with me.

=)

when i was finally out of the operation theater,

i was still shaking very badly & felt like ice even with the layers of blanket covering me.

drifted in & out of sleep & finally i was pushed back to my room.

the first 2 people i saw was my fil & my husband.

after drifting in & out of sleep in my own bed this time,

they finally pushed baby to me.

and my in-laws, my mom, hubby, my extended in-law family were there.

EVERYBODY WAS SNATCHING TO CARRY HER & TAKE HER PHOTO LAH!

see what i mean? lol.

(-_-")

and she was crying like crazy becos she was hungry.

my mom took the photo.
see! proof! lol.

at about 11PM plus everyone left,

and i mass msg some people to tell them of the good news.

sorry if i didnt reply everyone after that,

as i was very tired & still weak.

after that,

i breast-fed my baby girl for the first time.

=D

she is such a clever girl,

latching & sucking on immediately as if she had done it a million times.

despite still being in pain,

THE PAIN WAS ALL WORTH IT!

i got to experience what a man would never understand & ever feel,

i became a mummy,

& watched in amazement & awe as i watched my little blob i first saw on my first scan grew to become the most beautiful girl in the world.

=)

anyway,

thank you everyone for all the gifts & flowers & hampers & dozen boxes of chicken essences & fish essence & angpaos.

this was what i got the first day.
lazy to take photos of the hampers & flowers & other stuffs
for the other subsequent days.

thank you for visiting me & baby for family & friends who came down.

=)

to my mom & hubby & my in laws for keeping me company & constantly checking up on me to see if i was doing alright.

it made my days at the hospital seem shorter.